Mario - The Rise of Evil -CHAPTER ONE-

[superhammerbros100]

Like every normal day, Mario was in his house. No villains did something bad for the past week.
Mario was getting bored.

-Luigi, where are you?- Mario said.

Mario thought something weird was going on, he went to the Mushroom Kingdom

-Have you seen Luigi?- Mario tells to an Toad.

-No, i haven't seen him for the past week- Toad said.

Mario thought something wasn't going well.

He went to Bowser's Castle.

A Koopa, surprised from Mario's visit, calls the entire troop.

-You got Luigi, don't you?!- Mario, says while angry.

Goomba responded -We don't have him, nor care about him, but you're not welcome here!-

Mario used an fire flower and attacked the troop.
He then asked, -Where is Luigi? Tell me, don't make me attack you again!-

-W-we, don't know where he is at.-
-Seriously, i swear.- Goomba, in a terrified state responds.

Mario went upstairs and kicked the Giant Red Door.

-Where is Luigi?!-

-So here we are, Mario.- Bowser, calmed says.

-I don't know why you are here, but i wanted to burn down SOMEONE'S face!-

-And that's yours, yours Mario!-

-We're not gonna go the nice way then Bowser?- Mario says.

-Then, why don't i show you what happens when someone doesn't give me my brother back?-

[PixelPest]

Your grammar is painfully bad and this story isn't too great either so far.

[superhammerbros100]

Your grammar is painfully bad and this story isn't too great either so far.

k

admins can lock it then

[Emral]

Please continue it.

[Mable]

So instead saying/trying to improve, you get all mad and say "whoa pls lock this k"

If you can't take critic now how will you do in the future?